spice up your sex life

How to mix it up in and outside the bedroom

Routines are important for some things in life, such as going to the gym, but they shouldn't play a part in your sex life. Oftentimes couples get stuck in a rut when it comes to the bedroom. Your sex life might need some spicing up if you and your partner exclusively have sex in the bedroom, always use the same positions or you never use sex toys. Or maybe you're hardly in the mood for sex, you skip foreplay, or you're just not having sex regularly. Do any of these things ring a bell? Fear not  here are 10 ways to spice up a dull sex life:

Sensual massage

1. Sensual massage

Invest in some massage oil, and have your partner give you a sensuous massage. This will help to get both of you in the mood for sex. Set the sexy tone with some candles, too. The intimate touching will lead to kissing and more.

Do something different

2. Do something different

Be spontaneous with your sex life  for instance, take off all your clothes right when you get home from work, and wait for your partner to arrive. Or surprise your partner with some gifts. Doing something different and spontaneous can help turn you both on.


3. Vocalize

Try talking to your partner about what you want to do to them later on in the bedroom. You can text them during work or when you're out with friends. This can help increase both of your sexual desire. Once you're with them, you both can finally enact your fantasy.

Spend time on foreplay

4. Spend time on foreplay

Foreplay is an essential component of good sex. You should take the time to make out with your partner, having it lead to extended foreplay before doing the deed. You'll both feel more satisfied afterward.

Wear lingerie

5. Dress up

Dressing in lingerie, costumes or something out of the ordinary can signal to your partner that this is no ordinary night and get them excited for the big reveal.

Naked Saturdays

6. Naked Saturdays

Once every month or two, clear one day during the weekend to do nothing but lounge around and watch TV with your partner. There's a catch, though  you have to spend the entire day naked together. It's definitely guaranteed you'll have sex a few times that day.

Try somewhere different

7. Try somewhere different

Instead of always having sex in the bedroom, try a new place, like the bathroom or kitchen. This can make sex more fun and out of the ordinary.

Leave secret notes

8. Leave secret notes

Write and hide a sexy note in your partner's coat pocket or wallet. You'll think all day about your partner discovering the note. Once he does discover it, he'll want to take you into the bedroom right away.

Check out a sex shop

9. Check out a sex shop

Check out an adult entertainment shop together with your partner. Browse all the different sex toys and lubricants. Most importantly, you should purchase an item or two to experience together during sex. This will definitely spice up your sex life.

Speak up

10. Speak up

Sometimes spicing up your sex life all boils down to telling your partner what turns you on right now. Don't be afraid to vocalize your desires. And be sure to give your partner instructions. They'll get turned on by being able to fully please you.

When it comes to sex, think outside the box

It's easy to get stuck in a rut of boring sex, especially if you've been in a relationship for years. Sometimes spicing up your sex life all comes down to thinking outside the box. Instead of settling for dull sex, try something new. You'll definitely reignite your flame of passion for one another.

  1. "13 Signs You Need to Spice Up Your Sex Life," Women's Health, February 21, 2016.
  2. "24 Ways You Can Immediately Spice Up Your Sex Life," Redbook, December 17, 2017.
  3. "10 Scientifically Proven Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life," Business Insider, September 12, 2012.

Relationships | sex | dating