How to deal with failure and rejection in a healthy manner
Everyone’s experienced failure and rejection at some point. Maybe you got passed up for a promotion at work, or you flunked that test when you studied so hard for it. Failing feels bad. But it’s an inevitable part of life. Here are seven positive ways to help you better handle failure and rejection:
1. Allow yourself to feel bad
Embrace your emotions. Failure is accompanied by anxiety, embarrassment, anger, sadness, and shame. These feelings are uncomfortable, but they can be motivating—you might work harder to find better solutions. Allow yourself to feel bad for a bit.
2. Practice healthy coping skills
These could be calling a friend, exercising, journaling, deep breathing, or getting a massage. Avoid behaviors that’ll only make you feel worse about yourself, like eating junk food or going on a shopping spree.
3. Repeat positive affirmations
Repeating positive affirmations, such as “Today is going to be an amazing day,” can help set a positive tone in the wake of failure. You should also revel in your achievements, too. These two things can help you cope better with failure.
4. Focus on yourself
Rather than focusing on the successes of others after experiencing a letdown, focus on everything that you’re grateful for in your life. Try to make everything you have the best that it can be.
5. Create a plan for moving forward
Don’t ruminate on all the things that went wrong. Instead, reflect on what you’ll do differently next time and create a plan based on what you learned from this experience.
6. Accept responsibility
It’s vital to accept an appropriate level of responsibility for your failure. But don’t unnecessarily blame yourself, or others, for your failures. When you think about your failures, search for explanations rather than excuses.
7. Remember to love yourself
At the end of the day, you have to work on loving yourself. If you’re feeling unfulfilled, you have to discover that fulfillment within yourself. As you learn to love yourself unconditionally, it’ll become easier to handle failure.
You’ve got this
It can feel scary experiencing failure and rejection. But remember that you’ve got this! Don’t be afraid to step outside your comfort zone and try new things, even if they could lead to failure. You’ll soon discover that failing or being rejected isn’t as bad as you imagined.
References
- “10 Healthy Ways to Cope with Failure,” Very Well Mind, November 12, 2019.
- “How to Deal with Failure and Rejection,” Cosmopolitan, November 22, 2016.
