The old song is right: Breaking up is hard to do. It's so hard, in fact, that a whole industry exists to help the brokenhearted get over it.
While it's always smart to seek advice in books, Web videos, or relationship experts, you can start to heal your broken heart by following a few simple tips.
Your first steps back into single life
First, it’s important that you don’t play the victim. Try hard instead to stay strong, positive, and upbeat. This will help to keep you out of any dreaded rebound relationship.
The best way to boost strength and positivity is to work on yourself. Resist the urge to book long hours of couch-time in your pajamas. Instead, treat yourself to a spa day or yoga class, explore a new hobby, and hang out with friends.
Working on yourself also gives you a chance to refocus your life. Reflect on what really matters to you. Fill the time once taken up by your ex by reconnecting with old friends, pushing for a promotion, or going on vacation.
Don't neglect self-care
While you’re refocusing, eat foods that’ll make you feel good and healthy. Junk food beckons after a breakup, but resist its call. Pig out on veggies and fruit instead, and cooks meals strong on whole grains and lean protein. These will help you keep your heart and health in shape. And consider yourself greenlit to eat dark chocolate, too. It’s filled with antioxidants.
To keep your mind as healthy as your heart, check out meditation apps. They can help you ditch negative thoughts and gain needed serenity and perspective. But stay away from any dating apps for at least six weeks.
Getting over the fact that it's over
And while you have your smartphone out, craft a post-breakup song playlist. Whether they’re breakup anthems or just dance tunes, download the music and crank it up at the gym, on a walk, or at home alone.
As your breakup songs play, let yourself have a good cry. Emotional outlet speeds healing and bouncing back. By letting out your sadness and grief, you will invite new, positive energy in.
Choose your breakup songs wisely, and choose your confidantes wisely, too. Negative people will be no good for you, so seek out people you have fun with, and who don’t focus on their own problems and worries. Let your friends support you, and give yourself the time you need to heal and move on.
Moving on involves recognizing all the “me time” you have now. This means you should try things you’ve always wanted to try. If you’ve always wanted to try a cooking class or join a book club, now is the time. If cash is tight, try organizing your own inexpensive activities with friends.
Every ending is a new beginning
As you put into practice these tips, always keep in mind that it’s the end of a relationship, not the end of the world. By building faith and confidence in yourself, you'll come out the other side ready for new possibilities. Who knows? You may even meet your soul mate.
- "8 Things To Do To Help Heal Your Broken Heart," The Huffington Post, April 21, 2016.
- "12 Women Share What Got Them Through The Worst Breakups Of Their Lives," Self, February 12, 2016.
- "15 Ways to Get Over a Breakup Like a Grown Woman," Cosmopolitan, May 28, 2014.
- "How To Get Over Even The Worst Break Up," Vixen Daily, August 2015.