Watch out for these red flags when dating
Dating can be exciting as you’re first getting to know someone. But it’s easy to make excuses for a love interest’s behavior in the early stages, especially if you really like them. Word to the wise — don’t. Here are 10 dating red flags every person should watch out for:
1. They move too fast
Some people will push for a commitment right after they’ve started dating you. This is a huge red flag — when someone pushes for commitment prematurely, it signals not only that they’re insecure, but that they also have low emotional intelligence. Essentially, insecure people are trying to “lock you down” before you begin to notice their flaws.
2. They’re controlling
If you notice that the person you’re dating takes the lead on everything, this means they may be controlling. For instance, a controlling person might feel the need to plan out every date without asking your input or tell you what and how much to eat. If you notice these tendencies, you should run away fast.
3. The sex is bad
Nothing is worse than bad sex, and it can signal that you’re not physically compatible with one another. Worse yet, if your love interest is unwilling to talk about problems in the bedroom, then your sex life together is doomed to fail.
4. They play games with you
If you notice you’re dating someone who runs hot and cold, then chances are, they’re playing mind games. Oftentimes people who play mind games will be attentive one minute, then ignore your texts the next. You should only date someone who’s genuinely interested in spending time with you, and who is consistently responsive.
5. They don’t initiate dates
Does the person you’re dating always wait for you to invite them to something? This is a red flag signaling they’re just not that into you. If you’re the one who always initiates contact and plans dates, then you probably like him more than he likes you. You should date a guy who initiates contact and invites you to do stuff.
6. They lack ambition
If the person you’re dating doesn’t have his shit together, this is definitely a tell-tale sign you should end things. It’s one thing if they’ve encountered some setbacks in life, and they’re working hard towards a career goal, but it’s another thing if they lack ambition altogether. If both of you are in different places in life and have different attitudes toward success, then it’s not going to work out.
7. They’re selfish
Do you notice that your date only talks about themself or only wants to do things that they find interesting? This is a huge sign of selfishness. Ideally, someone you’re dating should express interest in things that interest you and should want to get to know you better. Ditch them for someone who actually cares about you.
8. They haven’t introduced you to friends and family
If you’ve been dating someone for several months, they will naturally incorporate you into their life more and more. If six months go by and you haven’t met a soul, there may be a reason — and you deserve to know it.
9. They’re rude to you
Does your love interest sometimes make off-handed comments about your appearance or interests? Do they tease you often, even when you’ve asked them not to? If your date is flat-out rude to you and your friends, then you should ditch them pronto. This is a sign that they’re trying to lower your self-esteem, and it’s unhealthy.
10. They’re always too busy
Whenever you make plans with your date, do you notice that they often say they’re too busy to hang out? This clearly means that you’re not a priority in their life, and you should end things right away. If they can’t make time for you, then you shouldn’t make time for them.
You deserve better
While dating can be tough, don’t ever settle for less. If you notice any red flags early on, ditch your date for good. This will free you up so you can find a better catch who truly respects you and appreciates you for who you are.
1. “11 Dating Don’ts You Should Never Accept from Your Guy,” Glamour, n.d.
2. “10 Red Flags no Grown-Ass Woman Should Ignore When She Starts Dating Someone New,” Bustle, June 4, 2015.
3. “16 Red Flags Men and Women Ignored Until it was too Late,” Huffington Post, December 4, 2014.
4. “24 Relationship Red Flags You Should Never Ignore,” Self, December 31, 2015.
5. “The Red Flags to Look out for When You Start Dating Someone,” Life Hacker, February 11, 2016.