First dates are nerve-wracking. Not only are you meeting someone for the first time in-person, but you're also wanting to make the best first impression possible. If the first date goes well, and you end up on a second date, it's actually far more important than the first. Here's why.
You find out your date's true love potential
While the first date is all about briefing checking someone out, the second date is about discovering his true potential as a long-term partner. During the second date, it's crucial to learn more about your guy. Most first dates aren't super amazing and -- in fact -- can be super awkward. But if your guy agrees to a second date, then that shows he's more serious in his intentions. Studies show both women and men who are serious about finding a committed partner are more than 70% more likely to go on a second date. Why? Because the more you get to know a person, the more likely you are to actually like them over time.
The second date is more serious
During the second date, you find out if your date is actually worth pursuing. You're able to get past superficial conversation and ask deeper questions that'll reveal if the both of you are truly compatible. Contrary to popular belief, most people in long-term relationships didn't feel sparks when they first met their partners. Instead, love and intimacy grew over time. That's why, unless there are obvious red flags, you should give your date a chance to prove himself.
The second date should be about creativity -- don't just go out to dinner. Rather, pick a fun activity that engages both of your passions and/or hobbies. If both you and your date are into fitness and the outdoors, then plan a romantic hike and picnic together. Or if both of you love art, then check out a museum together. Bonding over shared interests is key to advancing to a third date. After all, the second date is all about getting to know your date in a more real way.
Up your odds of landing a second date
You can increase your odds of landing a second date by being yourself on the first date. A lot of women stress out about the first date, and this can make things awkward. Don't worry about the little things, such as, "Did I wear the right dress? Is this bar cool enough? Am I talking too much?" Focus your attention on your date's demeanor, smile, sex appeal, personality and life goals.
On the first date, choose dinner and drinks, and go to a pricier restaurant. This will significantly increase your chances of going on a second date. While talking with your date, discuss politics, which will show that you're engaged in our culture. Better yet, show off your humorous side and your wit. Men are more likely to ask women out on a second date if they find them to be smart and funny.
Most importantly, if you've had fun on your first date, let the guy know. A guy who is serious about a long-term relationship is far more likely to ask you out on a second date if you tell him directly that you've had a good time. How can you tell if your date is into you? His voice will usually get louder. And if you both are laughing at the same things, that's a great sign, too.
Don't stress out about who pays on the date, whether or not you kiss on the first date, and whether or not you end up having sex on the first date.
Remember to relax
Dating can be intimidating, but it doesn't have to be. Remember on both the first and second dates to remain cool and collected. To increase your chances of landing a second date, suggest dinner at a fancy restaurant and really show off your personality. If you score a second date, use it as an opportunity to really get to know your date as a person, and determine if the both of you are truly compatible. Happy dating!
- "Why The Second Date is So Much More Important Than The First," Cosmopolitan, November 9, 2016.
- "Why The Second Date is More Important Than The First," AskMen, n.d.
- "Why Second Dates are More Important Than First Dates," Patch, April 17, 2012.
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